This divorce tip will be straight to the point.  Do not move out of the house/apartment unless you are forced to via a court order!  Your wife may demand that you move out, and you may feel like the only way to get some peace is to take yourself out the “battle ground”, but this will more than likely be the first (and possibly biggest) mistake that you will make during your divorce.

You may be thinking that the move is only temporary and the divorce courts will decide later on down the road that you are truly entitled to live in your home.  Through my own experience and divorce, I can safely guarantee you this… Don’t count on it!  By moving out of the home, you are telling the court two things:

1) You don’t want or need the home and that you have the financial means to find other residence while your wife will claim otherwise.  Once you officially leave the house, it is almost impossible to make your way back in, even if you are the one who pays the mortgage or rent.

2) If you have kids, you are making the statement that you have no problem abandoning them and letting your spouse have full custody.  Even though, we all know that this is not true, the courts will see otherwise.  There will be NO statement that you can make in court that will justify why you chose to leave your kids behind.

If there is no possible way that you will be able to live under the same roof as your soon to be ex-wife, then you may want to propose sharing the residence, but at different times.  This way you can both claim the home as your legal residence, but don’t have to be in each other’s face all the time.  And your kids have the chance to remain in the home that they are used to.  A home that they consider to be a “safe place”.

There are a couple of divorce tricks that you need to be on the look out for.  You may find that your wife has changed the locks to your home, in order to keep you from getting back in.  Remember, this is legally still your home too, so even though you might not want to, you have every right to “break-in”.  I say this with quotes, because you can’t get into trouble for breaking into your own home.  People forget their keys all the time and don’t get arrested for it.

Another, dirtier trick that is usually cooked up between your wife and her divorce attorney is to make some false accusation against you.  Whether she claims that she is afraid for her life, or if she goes to the extreme to falsely accuse you of having physically abused her or your kids, she is doing it for one reason.  She is making an attempt to get an emergency court order that will keep you from having any contact with her or your kids, and to keep you from being allowed to come on YOUR property.  Unfortunately, this happens more than you think.  This may only be temporary until it gets settled in court, but you will be kept from your home for at least 2 weeks.  My #1 suggestion when this happens: Don’t retaliate! Just work with your divorce attorney to get things settled as quickly as possible.  Retaliation will only work to back your wife’s accusations.

If anyone out there has had a similar situation or some additional advice, please share it with all of us here.  More information is always better, and there is a very big chance that someone else here is going through the exact same situation in their divorce.