Comments on: The Contested Divorce http://mensdivorcehq.org/the-contested-divorce.php Information, Tips & Tactics on Divorce Fri, 18 May 2012 20:05:39 +0000 hourly 1 http://wordpress.org/?v=3.3.1 By: Chris (admin) http://mensdivorcehq.org/the-contested-divorce.php/comment-page-1#comment-251 Chris (admin) Mon, 13 Jul 2009 19:30:41 +0000 http://mensdivorcehq.org/?p=82#comment-251 Victor, If a divorce is imminent and you live in a no-fault state (which most states are) then it doesn't make any difference who files for a divorce first. If you both are waiting for the other to make the first move, it just adds more tension and conflict to an already high stress situation. I filed first in my divorce and was not looked upon any differently. Now if you live in an at-fault state the person who is claiming that they have been wronged (ie cheated on) generally files first, but such situations are getting rare. Most married couples claim irreconcilable differences as the reason for the divorce. Chris (Disclaimer: Remember, I don’t have a law degree, I am not a divorce attorney and any information and/or opinions that I provide should not be construed as legal advice.) Victor,

If a divorce is imminent and you live in a no-fault state (which most states are) then it doesn’t make any difference who files for a divorce first. If you both are waiting for the other to make the first move, it just adds more tension and conflict to an already high stress situation. I filed first in my divorce and was not looked upon any differently.

Now if you live in an at-fault state the person who is claiming that they have been wronged (ie cheated on) generally files first, but such situations are getting rare. Most married couples claim irreconcilable differences as the reason for the divorce.

Chris

(Disclaimer: Remember, I don’t have a law degree, I am not a divorce attorney and any information and/or opinions that I provide should not be construed as legal advice.)

]]> By: Victor http://mensdivorcehq.org/the-contested-divorce.php/comment-page-1#comment-249 Victor Mon, 13 Jul 2009 15:47:31 +0000 http://mensdivorcehq.org/?p=82#comment-249 I have one fast question,Should i force her too file first ans have ME served or should i go ahead and do it first? And does it make a diffrence? I have one fast question,Should i force her too file first ans have ME served or should i go ahead and do it first? And does it make a diffrence?

]]> By: Kelly Brown http://mensdivorcehq.org/the-contested-divorce.php/comment-page-1#comment-228 Kelly Brown Fri, 12 Jun 2009 17:17:12 +0000 http://mensdivorcehq.org/?p=82#comment-228 The best divorce information i have found is exactly here. Keep going...Thank you! The best divorce information i have found is exactly here. Keep going…Thank you!

]]> By: mark http://mensdivorcehq.org/the-contested-divorce.php/comment-page-1#comment-23 mark Wed, 10 Dec 2008 04:23:51 +0000 http://mensdivorcehq.org/?p=82#comment-23 Hi I left co-op she changed locks my lawyer says get cheap apartment. Made agreement she dragged time did not sign I'm in court first date judge orders me to pay all maintenance for co-op,her lawyer fee ,plus two hundred a week and appraisals of all assets.we have been married 8 years no children she has worked from day one.I felt like a criminal my lawyer says judge could rule to pay alimony.oh this judge is female and a former nun.men have no rights it seems to me that there can be no fairness until laws are reformed. Hi I left co-op she changed locks my lawyer says get cheap apartment. Made agreement she dragged time did not sign I’m in court first date judge orders me to pay all maintenance for co-op,her lawyer fee ,plus two hundred a week and appraisals of all assets.we have been married 8 years no children she has worked from day one.I felt like a criminal
my lawyer says judge could rule to pay alimony.oh this judge is female and a former nun.men have no rights it seems to me that there can be no fairness until laws are reformed.

]]> By: Chris (admin) http://mensdivorcehq.org/the-contested-divorce.php/comment-page-1#comment-7 Chris (admin) Tue, 25 Nov 2008 18:56:13 +0000 http://mensdivorcehq.org/?p=82#comment-7 Sean, Remember, I am not a divorce attorney so do not take this as legal advice this is just my thoughts from what I have researched and experienced. Once you move out of the home (or apartment), you will lose a lot of leverage in the negotiations. Especially if there are children involved. I never recommend moving out of the home on a voluntary basis, and in your case I would be very weary because of the father being the landlord. The only time you should move out is if there is an agreement between your attorneys or if you are ordered to by a judge. With her making demands this quickly, it seems that she is very eager to get you out which you can actually use to your advantage. Get an attorney if you haven’t already and have him draw up the papers to your liking and let her know that the only way you are leaving is if all of this is settled. Most importantly protect your livelihood (the business) and always fight to get as much time with your kids as you can. Those two issues you should never back down on. But here is a quick warning… she may get very desperate and start making false accusations against you. This doesn’t mean you will get into any criminal problems, but she can try and use it to get a court order to have you removed from the apartment. This can be in the form of a protection order, restraining order, or a no contact order. That is why it is so crucial for you to find a divorce attorney in the very near future. Like them or not, they do know the legal ways to protect your interests. Hope this helps! Sean,

Remember, I am not a divorce attorney so do not take this as legal advice this is just my thoughts from what I have researched and experienced.

Once you move out of the home (or apartment), you will lose a lot of leverage in the negotiations. Especially if there are children involved. I never recommend moving out of the home on a voluntary basis, and in your case I would be very weary because of the father being the landlord. The only time you should move out is if there is an agreement between your attorneys or if you are ordered to by a judge.

With her making demands this quickly, it seems that she is very eager to get you out which you can actually use to your advantage. Get an attorney if you haven’t already and have him draw up the papers to your liking and let her know that the only way you are leaving is if all of this is settled. Most importantly protect your livelihood (the business) and always fight to get as much time with your kids as you can. Those two issues you should never back down on.

But here is a quick warning… she may get very desperate and start making false accusations against you. This doesn’t mean you will get into any criminal problems, but she can try and use it to get a court order to have you removed from the apartment. This can be in the form of a protection order, restraining order, or a no contact order. That is why it is so crucial for you to find a divorce attorney in the very near future. Like them or not, they do know the legal ways to protect your interests.

Hope this helps!

]]> By: sean allen http://mensdivorcehq.org/the-contested-divorce.php/comment-page-1#comment-5 sean allen Tue, 25 Nov 2008 17:44:16 +0000 http://mensdivorcehq.org/?p=82#comment-5 We are renting. She has served me with the papers last week. She wants me out but I want some things worked out before. 1. We own a business together. Her father is the landlord. I want to be sure my income will be available to secure and follow through with a year lease. 2. I want her to agree on a child visitation schedule. She wants the maximum. I want a bit more, like 65/35 - not 80/20. Should I expect this to be worked out before I move out? When should I move out? We are renting. She has served me with the papers last week. She wants me out but I want some things worked out before. 1. We own a business together. Her father is the landlord. I want to be sure my income will be available to secure and follow through with a year lease. 2. I want her to agree on a child visitation schedule. She wants the maximum. I want a bit more, like 65/35 – not 80/20. Should I expect this to be worked out before I move out? When should I move out?

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